Flight Mode

I have this urge to die. It's not a conscious desire, but deep down inside there's this push to just end it all. I feel overwhelmed by the magnitude of stuff I need to do in order to be a successful human by my own standards which are the only ones that matter. I feel completely out of control with my eating and I'm so damn tired all of the time. I just want to die. I don't want to be a parent anymore to a verbally abusive kid. I have 7 years of unfiled taxes. There's a lien on my house because Dan didn't deal with the strata. I can't seem to make enough money to pad up my bank account and my Etsy sales have dwindled. Fuck my life right now. I'm so depressed. I feel beyond unmotivated to do anything.

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